Short Shrifted

It was on one of my recent forays deep into the wilds of Google that I spotted it. Searching the furthest corners of the virtual world, J. Peterman style, on my latest quest — to discover T-shirt brands with exotically short hems.

I was hacking a swath through the nth page of of my umpteenth advanced search of the day, tired, a bit nauseous, when lo and behold: something caught my eye as it bolted out of the textual underbrush.

A Japan-based designer graphic T-shirt label! Hmmm. I took a closer look.

They actually had an English-language site! My interest was further piqued.

I clicked through. Found the size chart. As expected from a Japanese clothing company, it looked promising. Much shorter than the average American-sized T-shirt.

But surely this was too good to be true. They probably wouldn’t ship to the US…. Not so! They do indeed. In fact, they offer free worldwide shipping on orders over ¥10,000 (approx $100). Jackpot.

This mythical-sounding species I speak of? They’re called Graniph. And after bagging a couple for myself, I can report that they are beautifully designed and fit great. In fact, for short men of average or athletic build, these are the best-fitting T-shirts I’ve come across. [full disclosure: samples were provided to me by the company gratis]. Here are the details:

DESIGN:

They’ve got a well-curated range of smart, tasteful designs that are a bit more highbrow than your typical graphic tee. Where Threadless is All-American and fun-loving, Uniqlo is Japanese and kitschy, and Top Man strives to be British and street, Graniph seems a bit more cerebral, German, above the fray. I can see how they’d appeal to graphic and interior designer and photographer types. Personally, I like their aesthetic, from the retro to the goofy to the clever to the off-kilter to the blatantly self-promotional. But don’t take my word for it, cast an eyeball over theirtheir full T-shirt catalog.

FIT:

As I said before, for short men of average or even heavier build, these are the best-fitting T-shirts I’ve seen. They seem to be shorter and yet a bit wider and looser-fitting than all the others I’ve tried — a rare combination. To give you a sense of how unusual this is, here’s how a Graniph Small stacks up against competing brands:

Advertised Chest/Length Comparison of Small T-shirts:

Clearly, Graniph has a roomier fit than these other major brands — while at the same time being significantly shorter.

Official company policy is not to use a machine dryer. T-shirt connoisseurs may hand-wash and line-dry, but for me (and probably a lot of other folks out there) that’s not a viable way to deal with my dirty-clothes-mound on a weekly basis. So if you plan to machine dry, David Smyth, a company rep, has some details on shrinkage and fit:

“We have two types of tees — basic tees (black tag) and soft tees (white tag). Soft tees will not shrink when washed as the material is polyester/cotton. Also the soft tees have a slightly tighter fit, which some people prefer. As for basic tees, these are 100% cotton, so when washed for the first time the white tees will shrink, hence they are slightly larger than other colors, to compensate for this shrinkage. Other colors will shrink very slightly.”

Personally, I found that Smalls went from a 38-inch chest/28-inch length to a 36-36.5 chest and anywhere from a 23.5-26 length (I think I had a mix of black and white labels) after a wash and a moderately toasty tumble in the dryer. Mediums went from a 40-inch chest/27.5-inch length to a 38-inch chest/24.5-26.5-inch length after drying.

You can see where this is going. For short men of moderate or even bulky builds, the eternal problem is that for those rare brands that may actually sorta fit kinda OK in the length, the chest/stomach/neck measurements are laughably too tight. Most T-shirts are skewed to tall-and-skinny Jarvis Cocker types. Even a large is 43-inch chest and only 29.5 long (and that’s before wash/dry) — the same length in AA only gets you a 34/36-inch chest.

PRICE:

Graniph’s shirts aren’t exactly cheap — about $25 a pop. But for the quality of cotton, printing, and design, I’d say these are a very good value. There are certainly plenty more expensive T-shirts out there. The shipping charge is $10 to the US. However, they offer free worldwide shipping on orders over ¥10,000 (approx $100, or about 4 full-price shirts).

So the smart thing to do is order enough shirts at a time to take advantage of the free shipping. If that’s more than you want or need, try splitting an order with a friend. David Smyth told me, “People often think that because we are in Japan it will cost a fortune to have the tees shipped, but we are trying to make our products accessible to everyone regardless of location.” With the shipping deal, I’d say they’ve succeeded.

(NOTE: Their extra-small size — “SS” — is cut differently and is meant for women, so “S” is probably the smallest you should order.)

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